Proud

I am proud

That every day for the last few months, no matter how bad, you have gotten up and faced the day ahead

That you have wrestled daily with grieving for your own losses and while helping the husband who caused your grief grieve

That you haven’t ripped off anyone’s head (yet)

That you have met every work deadline

That even though you look and feel like hell, you have showed up

That you haven’t permanently screwed up anyone else’s belief system with your venting

That you have fed yourself, read a few books, paid the bills, filed the taxes, shopped for food, returned library books on time, and balanced the budget

That you have made people laugh when they were about to cry

That you have given comfort to neighbors in need and found comfort in return

That you have protected people from the depth of pain that exists, knowing they couldn’t carry it and have no need to really

That you have trudged on despite being devastated that God has not comforted you

That you are still standing though your marriage, your faith, your reputation, your privacy, your comfort level, and your hope are shattered.

That you have done your best