I Suffer

I suffer
Watching him
Suffer

I suffer

Living without him
While he is still here

I suffer

For lack of finding
Others who understand suffering

I suffer

For lack of
True community

I suffer

Because though I have choices
They are limited

I suffer

Because so few people
Show up

I suffer because

Those who do show up
Can’t bear talk of pain

Leaving me

Grateful that anyone shows up but
Hurt that I must stifle pain
If I want them to stay

My pain is tiring to me

My pain is tiring to others
His pain is tiring to me

Wish there was

A quicker way through this
A more tolerable way

But there isn’t

And for now
Pain is everywhere
Pain is tiring and
I suffer