New Year

There was a time
Not so long ago
When the thought
Of looking
Even one day ahead
Overwhelmed me
With dread

When the thought

Of a new year
365 whole days
Of black unknown
Was too painful
To consider

But not this year

This year

It doesn’t matter

This year

Whatever comes to me
Is not
In control
Of me

I am no longer afraid

Of what might be lost

This year

Can’t rob me of
My peace of mind
My hope
My faith
My friendships
My marriage
My financial security
 
I have already lost
Or entertained the loss
Of all these things

Other than my life

Which I wouldn’t
Be around
To miss anyway
Should it be taken
This year
There is not much
To lose
 
This year
Can’t hurt me

This year

All that’s left
Of me
Is me

And I am

Made up of
More than everything around me
More than life’s comforts

My life is broken

But I am whole

Whole

In a way
That nothing
Taken from me
Can touch

So New Year

Do what you will
Take from me if you must
Or be kind if you’d like

I will be here

I will walk through you
Broken or blessed
But whole