Many Days

Many days
I woke up
Beyond empty

Certain

I couldn’t 
Face the day
Without God’s comfort

And there was no comfort

And the day happened anyway

And I got through that day

And the next one
And the one after that

Many days

The thought
Of a life
Without him
Was unthinkable

And then he was gone

Mentally vacated

And I lived my life anyway

And it changed me

Permanently
From within

There is

An unspeakable
Depth
Of despair

Walking face first

Into more
Than you can bear

In the bitter revelation

That no relief is coming
That life is happening anyway

You do it

Because you have to
If you
Want to
Live
 
You do it
Though it
Forever
Leaves you
Wondering

Why

Such deep
Reserves
Of courage

Are demanded

From reserves

That have
Long since
Run dry